Toilets come in all shapes, sizes, and behave in sometimes odd manners~ kind of like humans.

Toilets come in all shapes, sizes, and behave in sometimes odd manners~ kind of like humans. I would like to take you on a journey through the roller coaster ride that is Crohn's Disease and hope you come out of this a little more educated about you're own health.

Friday, March 9, 2012

People of Walmart

I have to document this somewhere because it is too hilarious not to.

At work last night I ended up assisting a poor soul who forgot her glasses. If anyone out there needs glasses to read, you should ALWAYS have a pair with you at ALL times to save you from embarrassment.

While putting out freight for another department (which my co-worker and I do all the time) an older woman (I would not say "elderly", she was just "older") asked if I worked there (I get this all the time, "why no, I don't work here, I just like wearing a white lab coat that says PHOTO LAB and I like putting up freight for free").

"Yes I work here."

"Could you help me with something? I don't have my glasses, would you read what this says for me?"

So I look at the box. It is Warming Touch KY Jelly.

I think about this for a second, about how I'm going to word this in a proper way.

So I just tell her what the box says, "Its called Warming Touch jelly for intimacy"

She totally didn't get it.

"What is it for?"

Really???

"Its for when you are intimate with someone."

"How do you use it?"

OH FOR PETE'S SAKE.

"Do you put it in your vagina? Is it for dryness? Like a douche?"

jeez.

"Well yes, essentially it can go in your vagina but that is not what its for. It's not for that kind of everyday use. It's 'warming touch' so it gets hot on contact- I don't know if you want that feeling all day. You should be able to find a douche with the health and beauty aids near the pharmacy."

Ok most ladies would want that feeling all day, heck it would make her happy but it won't help her dryness.

"Ha ha, ok thank you"

WHAT THE HECK.

What was I supposed to say?

"It's for when you are having sex and you put it on your clitoris!"

Really.

She probably didn't know what a clitoris is if she couldn't figure out what KY Jelly is for.

That was way to personal of an experience for me to have with a customer. It would have been more appropriate for her to ask the pharmacist than talk to me about this junk.